Super Hero Or Super Girlfriend?
Evan & Jaron- 'The distance'

Well that's how it feels on the edge of reason, just before I take the fall. Yes, for all my pride and rational behavior, I admit that now I'm finally losing it all to my heart. Call me foolhardy, but even a fool has his luck with the jackpot. I ever prayed that if this wasn't destiny it will eventually cease to matter, but I guess its hard to even verbally express what the heart wants to say now.

I can remember those moments that took my breath away. It's kinda like a defining point in time, when you're just looking at someone or something, and time is stopped fast on its own tracks. Like a blissful dream, one can only wish that those experiences will never come to an end.

Now herein lies the irony: I can't actually remember how, when or even why this happened. I just know what I feel now. I'm sure about my feelings, but maybe I'm feeling too much. I guess to her, that couldn't be more stupid. So while she falls away, I'm just about to take that plunge. Trust me, most of the time those kind of falls end in alot of blood and pain.

Which brings me to the idea of Superheroes once again. How did it feel, when they left the ledge, and discovered that they could fly? Were they ever deluding themselves from the start? It's a thin silk thread that separates dream from delusion, and genius from madness. You can ask me where I got my ideas, but I can only tell you they were out there long ago...waiting for me.

I do believe, like a child, that destiny has planned for someone. Its just like how God chooses and recognizes his children, even before the dawn of time. For now she's only a dream, when is it ever time for that reality to begin?

'Saving the last dance'

It's been a long time,
since I touched those magic shoes,
while it seems like yesterday,
my heart was pinned on your door,
with little birds singing empty songs
like it was never meant to be.

If only there was ink in the bottle,
I'll write you on every single star,
but I'm frail and much afraid.
In the sands of dreams you come and go,
with little nymphs playing dirty tricks,
like mirrors bearing broken faces.

If only I had my magic shoes,
I'll take your hand so mind your step,
My little firefly, you're gonna be
You can hear the music in the stars,
with dreams that color your every move,
I'll save my last dance, only for you.

Joel, August 2006
Seriously, got tsunami of assignments coming......and here I am musing all these stuff. :P

Style, with a vengeance

When we're young and having fun, without a care in the world, people (pastors, TV evangelists or basically ANYONE who sells religion) love to ask us this fundamental question: What would you do if you only had 24 hours to live? Technically, one should expect charitable answers of good deeds for the moral advancement of our screwed up society. It's noble, but way to cliched. The truth is, we're all selfish people and if we found just out of the blue we had only a day's worth of tokens, its possible we might just spend the whole day wondering who poisoned our Ribenas.

On Sept 2006, Crank's Chev Chelios (Jason Statham) will make himself the englightened Avenger. Knowing that he's been injected with a lethal drug known as the 'Beijing Cocktail', he kisses his bewildered girlfriend (Amy Smart) goodbye and goes on a warpath on the suspected culprits. There's a cause for this massive display of guns and bullets, after all hitmen don't have much of a social life. If there's one, its usually in the presence of their enemies.

Now, what kicks ass in this movie isn't the violence and sex formula that defines the current horde of B-grade flicks on late night TV, even though that's how its synthesized. What audiences will get here is a Northern-english stud who broods and butchers his way through an army of underworld guys, without giving a damn about what the world thinks. Of course, fans of the genre might observe similarities with earlier hits like Transporter, but this time the level of female subordination is more intense. Sorry, this has no Shu Qi with sniper rifles or flying kicks. All the babes are just here for the sex, so expect the females to develop an allergic response.

I haven't had my share of chauvinism in film for quite some time. As a guy, appreciating the finer art of being emo and other aesthetics benefits the brain, but there are isolated, rare moments when you feel someone's been tampering with the wires in your life, and jackass thrills with fire and heights just don't make the cut. Like what the tagline in the film says, there are a thousand ways to raise your adrenaline. There will come a time (if you're MAN enough), when you will need everyone of them.

Au revoir

Dance with me?

Question 1): Why are most feminists lesbians?

I think these women don't get it. Objectification, stereotyping and sex symbols are just simply false consciousness these people bring into naive female minds. Same sex relationships are not evolutionary possible, so it isn't a matter of culture or nuture, its a totally DSM IV classified psychological aberration. Men were never meant to rule the world, because they always get manipulated by their wives. We're just airheads too proud to admit that universal fact. I'm not homophobic, I really believe girl-girl action rocks, especially in porn movies. They even write brilliant stuff on the liberation of female sexuality, but then again CT scans have shown unusually active regions in their cranuims. The same goes for the gifted kids with Asperger's Syndrome.

Question 2): Are goody-two-shoes gals attractive?

NO way, sometimes these guys should just wake up from their romantic comas. Guai-gers (e.g. twits), yes I had one for a girlfriend before. When we went our separate ways, I kinda re-programmed her into a killer droid. Yes GGs are the most fussy, conceited, artificial, pussy-weak creatures on this world. They look so nice and obedient that they can leach you off your EVERYTHING within seconds! They just want their boyfriends to please them, but they don't have the means to do likewise. They are just nerds with a cloned version about the world, apart from that they're not special at all. Oh they can study pretty well, but without a true human life to speak of, they're BORING.

Question 3): What do the Japanese do to their genes?

Damn, really our ex-conquerers have radioactive dust in their bloodlines, but they're only getting better. Anime, Kabuki, Geishas and now...Kurara Chibana!




I think they use advanced technololgy for beauty, technology so arcane and clandestine the world must never know about it. We're all orientals, we shared the same genetic and Neanthertal ancestor. I still look like the latter, but Kurara personifies the mythology of the Sun Goddess! And yes kudos to Monsieur Goh for showing another gift to the world, again from the Rising Sun.

http://blog.honeyee.com/jessica/

Question 4): Why do the chiobus of yester-year look like shit today?

Few people keep their charm for eternity. Dear friend, if you were ridiculed, scoffed at or bullied in school because of your looks, fret not. Bad karma will befall the perpetrators, but still the point I'm trying to make here is that the graphical analysis of looks Vs time is more like a bell curve than anything. There were two fraternal twins I used to know. The older one was a school belle, and with a more demure reserved personality she got herself a boyfriend. The younger was more out-going. I kinda preferred her to her sister, because she was more approachable. The boys were not really into her, because she looked like a mouse?

10 years later, I interviewed one of their close guy-friends. He's a witty suave sweet-talker whom I find it too easy to despise.

On the elder: 'Har...she looks haggard man'
On the younger: 'Wah..did you see her the other time, she looks like Fiona Xie!'

C'mon girls take a dive into our pools. You'll never drown. In fact, you migt just hit your head on the floor and bleed in our waters.

Question 5): Can chasing girls be THIS easy, please?



Do a you know a good dancer can increase his/her sex appeal by 500%? And I don't mean
peanut shells...or breakdancing, although the latter has death defying circus acrobatics. Anyway, I just miss rockin the floor with my crew...even our dancing coach is too fat to execute most of the moves himself now. I need Wade Robson!

'Here's looking at you kid'

Last year, I hugged her for the very first and last time. When she said goodbye, a thousand questions in my mind, never answered, were laid to rest.

Perhaps five years ago, if I gave myself that chance, there will never be a last embrace. I guess..that's the only thing that brings regret.

So when I look at you now, whether in real or pictures, I ask myself if I ever should be feeling this way. Can't say I know everything about you. For what I know, its not conventional attraction.

I gotta admit. You're not what I thought I wanted, even when you mean so much more. I'm not worried you'll say 'no'. I just wonder why it had to be you in the first place. You're not like the rest, simply because what makes them different and weird, it makes you beautiful.

Damn, I can't even write properly cos you're exciting...but not inspiring.

But when I think about what happened to her. I just know I can't let it happen to you. No...not when I'm this close to something that can alter the course of my own life.

So now, the sky's below me. I've always dreamed of skydiving...so I guess its an epiphany.
Thing is, will you be there to catch me?

Retro-respect Top 10 countdown

Cartoons in the 21st century have better storylines, effects and well, cartoons. But life back then, without Internet pornography, Playstation and MTv was much simpler. Well, at least I collected Micromachines and Masters of the Universe, played basketball, and figured She-Ra was the hottest woman alive. Since, we're all pretty much a cultural product of our histories, its time to pay tribute to the toons that made everything else possible.



#10 Alvin and the chipmunks
What's it about : 3 chipmunks that act and talk like men. They're adopted by this guy called Dave who doesn't mind they socialise with normal human beings. Alvin's the playful, flamboyant rodent who likes to hook up the babes. Simon's the geek who talks science and gadgets, while Theodore, just likes to eat. They love to sing, dance and play musical instruments, thus showing everyone that those with faces like mice, rats and hamsters can still be superstars.
Why it rocks: Sing along now! 'We're the chipmunks! C-H-I-P-M-U-N-K We're the chipmunks, guaranteed to brighten your day!'

#9 Gummi Bears
What's it about: Hyperactive bears that drink grape-looking juice and jump like ping pong balls. They are often seen helping a bunch of kids and the bad evil boss is an Aryan-looking dude with a moustache. With the power of gummi berry juice, the Bears will then be able to reunite the other bears scattered throughout the world and resurrect their once powerful city.
Why they rock: My uncle looks like them and yes I have other live size versions in school and elsewhere. Cute right?


#8 Mighty mouse and friends
What's it about : A small mouse with yellow spandex and red underwear who takes down villians 10 times his size. The show includes other characters like 2 crows who always seem to be smarter than the guy hunting them
Why it rocks: My mother said I'm small, she also said I was destined for big things. I found out much later that all mothers say the same things


#7 M.A.S.K
What's it about: A 'cartoon n cars' perversion of King Arthur and the knights of the round table. Ordinary men wear helmets meant for chemical defence, and road vehicles transform into weapons of war. The leader of the villiains looks just like Saddam Hussien. It was quite prophetic, as the series was aired before the first Gulf war.
Why it rocks: I played with the toys so much, all the masks that came with the action figures went missing when I stopped.

#6 He-Man and the masters of the universe
What's it about: Timid and homosexual prince Adam gets powers from a hot looking sorceress and turns into masochistic and muscular He-man just by wielding a sword. His arch enemy is Skeletor, a blue-skinned freak with a skull for a face. Runs parallel plotlines with She-ra, princess of power, but the girls never took that cartoon too well. Today, the original, mint-boxed version of Castle Grayskull is worth hundreds of dollars.
Why it rocks: Any one with a dick who hated HE-MAN when young grew up to be gay.


#5 Bravestarr
What's it about: Set in the futuristic Wild West, Indian sheriff Bravestarr has the following mystical powers: eyes of the hawk, ears of the wolf, strength of the bear and speed of the puma. Together with his talking grey horse Thirty-Thirty, Bravestarr defends the gnomes of the town from the evil viles of Tex-hex
Why it rocks: I had the Thirty-Thirty action figure for my 9th birthday. I was so delighted I exclaimed, "Hey everyone, finally my horse can stand!"


#4 Count Duckula
What's it about: In the heart of Transylvania, there lived a dynasty of vampire ducks. The villagers (who are also birds) were so terrorized that they decided to pierce his heart, but they did not know that Egor, the count's faithful butler, was able to revive him. As there wasn't blood in the castle, Egor used tomato ketchup for the rejunvination. So dear children, we have count duckula, the vegetarian vampire duck who is constantly smothered by his chicken head nanny. "OOH duckie-poo!"
Why it rocks: I watched it until I was 14. I guess bird brains make me laugh.


#3 Sabre Rider
What's it about: Back in those days, Macross and Gundam were good but deep stuff. I borrowed the books and pretended that I understood, but the significance just wasn't there. I mean when you're only 10, your mind can only absorb concepts in 'power-ranger' format. Star sheriffs Saber rider, Fireball and Colt were like the sensational heroes who could defeat crime anytime. Chilvary, nobility and lotsa lasers, it wasn't too hard for a kid like me to understand. Not forgetting, the theme song was the coolest one on TV yet.
Why it rocks: I used to tell myself that I will marry April Angel (the blonde, doe-eyed female lead) when I grow up, but I think she's dead now.

#2 Silverhawks
What's it about: Notorious space criminal Mon-star (pronounced 'monster') escapes from prison and threathens the galactic peace. Captian Stargazer calls upon the Earth Alliance to dispatch their half-man, half-robot special force known as the Silver Hawks. With superhuman strength and space flight, the Silverhawks battle Mon-star's lackeys, who have the lamest names (e.g. Mambo Jumbo, Hardware, Melodia).
Why it rocks: It was the most stylish cartoon ever made. If angels do exist, they will look like them.

#1 Transformers
What's it about: Robots from Cybertron take their war to planet earth. Optimus Prime, leader of the heroic autobots, defends the liliputian humans from the treacherous decepticons, headed by the evil Megatron. The series has outlived most of the other cartoons on this list, with artists and writers giving the robots a better disguise for this season's toy release.
Why it rocks: I've watched the movie more than 20 times. The effect is like Titanic (I never finished that sinking movie starring Leo & Kate, its just to tell everyone how much of a fan I am).