Girls and soccer :P

Girls are like soccer,
Season not open, you're playing in an empty field .

Girls are like soccer,
The guy of their dreams has a free flow of penalties.

Girls are like soccer,
If she doesn't like you, its a red card.

Girls are like soccer,
Her parents are the referees, so be nice.

Girls are like soccer,
Once you score, you normally have to defend.

Girls are like soccer,
If the guy loses, he blames the manager.

Girls are like soccer,
the hotter they are, the higher the league.

Grils are like soccer,
Love at first sight is like Geylang United vs Brazil.

Girls are like soccer,
If you don't communicate, you pass the ball to your opponent.

Girls are like soccer,
The richest teams win the most matches.

Girls are like soccer,
Hot favourites are offside when they screw up the first date.

Girls are like soccer,
When you bet, you don't always win.

Girls are like soccer,
At the end of the day, you just need the 'golden balls'.

Girls are like soccer,
Some of them like to end with penalty shoot-outs, but we don't.

First goal...

Season is open.
It was a longshot, but it definitely worked.

With the haze, exams, and a career crisis, it wasn't the best way to kick-off the match.
This player is old, he actually wants to hang his boots.

Thing is, he's been training all his life for this one.
'Carpe Diem'

Au Revoir

The karma factor

After learning that there are only 3 types of suicide, my thoughts started to drift into the logic of Buddhism. Its been a simple way of life that people often mistake for religion, but I do admire its simplicity and noble truths. Tantric postures are known to calm the nerves and increase sexual energy. Now, that is enlightening.

Well anyway, I was sharing with Kylie some of the important doctrines about reincarnation. Yeah, you know the big wheel that assumes all of us and turns round and round? One revolution is equal to one lifetime. The rules governing this vehicle are relatively simple. Bascially if you store a substantial surplus of Karma (not Kylie) in one round, the next trip of life is supposed to be better. However if you rape some girls or murder some kids, you lose consciousness by being an american cockroach in your next life. In order to attain enlightenment, you have to play the game using the Noble truths. Since I'm only a novice, here's the first and only one I know: LIFE SUCKS

But anyway, Kylie was better than me. She taught me the skills to discovering 'who you were' last time. Cool right? I'm not sure if its Zen or Men but well it works. In addition, given my ability to split brains, I decided to work on some of the folks in class too. Its sensitive material, so if you want to know who you were in your previous life, kindly drop me a message below. This only applies to those in school.

Here are the list of..well lives? (mine's the first)

A buddhist abbot who had trouble with women. He was grand advisor to the emperor because of his 'apparent wisdom' but he loved women and ate meat. He can't fight but he wrote quite a few forbidden scriptures. Turns out they were just porn texts.

A 'mamasan' or mother courtesan in a brothel. She amassed dozens of buxom babes in her brothel. Apparently when the first ang-moh traders came to china, she invited all of them in to her room. They call it Dragon Mansion or something. Orgies....and more orgies.

The mamasan had 2 very beautiful prostitutes though. One played musical instruments for drunkards who ate salted eggs, the other one was the most popular 'jewel', but a total gossip with smelly news.


A eunuch who escaped castration. Oh my, this one was a cunning fox. The emperor loved him loads too, and he was the favourite playmate to many of the courtesans. He ran on the same life as casanova, but he had seven wives who were babes that lost their figure the moment they went into labor.

A princess with bound feet. Legend has it she loves to play with rabbits. When her father the emperor wanted her to marry a man she didn't love, she prayed to to the earth god to turn her into a bunny.

A taoist priest. Once a buddhist monk in a temple the abbot knows nothing about, he was thrown out by his teacher when he started to levitate coins, leaves, and other monks' trousers. Well he almost turned mad, but he invented this internal force known as 'Tai-chi'. Its slow and steady, but he had lotsa students

A farmer. This one quite charm (pitiful). He worked his grains for 15 hours a day and he fell in love with a rich man's daughter. There are 2 endings to his story. First, they were caught and thrown into the river basket. Second, they eloped but were murdered by bandits. Apparently, karma in this case would get carried on to the next life.

A bao-seller. Well he was crude and not so charming, but he had a good heart and ego! Well he had a very pretty wife and a very strong hunky brother. His brother killed a tiger. Well actually he was the one, but because his brother looked better on paintings, the credit didn't go to him. Sad, even his wife kept seducing the brother. BITCH.

An inn-keeper's wife. Horny as hell. Only Budhha knows how many scholars, generals, swordsmen she has shagged with man. Everytime those studs are drinking their rice wine, she will get cosy with them. Her husband was an idiot, he made the beds in the inn for 50 years but never found out.

A magistrate's daughter. She was very good with money. She got herself into some scandal when she dressed up as a man and pawned all her father's flower pots for a dragon's egg. According to the blind storyteller, she was fooled into believing that the egg would give her the man of her dreams. It was only a duck's egg, and the duckling died the moment it saw her.

Ok...tat's all for now.
I will meditate and see if there's more
LOL

'This is Sparta'

The comic is buried somewhere in my drawers. I bought it 5 years ago, and devoured it in a day. It's a raw, violent, dramatized account of the legendary battle where 300 spartans stood against the might of the Persian Empire at the pass of Thermopylae. The emotion of a Homeric classic with the high octane action that Frank Miller (Dark Knight Returns & Sin City) brings to all his works. Stories of war have NEVER been this good.

It might seem like a visual exaggeration of actual events, especially where the actual numbers of the Persian army were concerned. Mr Miller, however avoids the mistake of historical fallacy at this juncture, by alluding them to the 'armies of asia'. Back in the known world, Persians and Greeks knew nothing of China. The latter believed they were endowed with the gifts of logic, reason and freedom, while Xerxes of Persia believed he was god. After reading the comic at least thrice, I was inclined to believe that the sequence of events wasn't as accurate as it should be. I mean, Frank Miller writes superhero comics, not history. Verily, I was in for a disturbing surprise. Here's the truth to the trivia:

1) The Spartans did their PT naked. Its called calisthenics. Imagine having your testicles brusied by the ground.

2) Spartan women are sexy. They don't cry even when they know their husbands are going to die. When their sons reach puberty, they leave them in the forest to fend for themselves.

3) NO shit, the total Greek forces numbered 7000. Yet they held off a recorded 2 million men from the whole of Asia. (This includes, persians, babylonians, africans, egyptians, scythians, indians & yeah the ancestors of the Taliban). It got so bad that Xerxes had to flog his lackeys so that they could advance. Statistics showed that one spartan could kill a 100 men.

4)Unforutnately, they were REALLY betrayed by some shepherd, who led the Persians through another route. Leonidas actually retired the rest of the mecernary forces, leaving only his 300 guards (and some Thespians) to fight to the last man.

5) Now this willl blow some minds. Most of my friends tell me this line itself is worth the movie. Well, it is a recorded fact. When the Persian envoy told the Spartans that their arrows would blot out the sun, Dinekes one of the 300 spartan warriors, remarked:

"So much the better, we shall fight in the shade"

http://www.livius.org/he-hg/herodotus/logos7_22.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Thermopylae
http://www.apple.com/trailers/wb/300/trailer1/

Enjoy the links people
Au Revoir

Carpe diem

Sister Daph once remarked that I'm a romantic. For the record, this does not mean I'm a hopless lovey dovey who goes around whispering sweet-nothings to girls' ears. Even if there is an urgent need to do so, its has to be performed with the flow and style of Byron or Shakespeare :P

Contrary to popular belief, a 'romantic' isn't just a name you give to your friend who is in love. Romanticism was a literary and artistic movement within European history that inspired both idealist and hedonist philosophies. The romantics firmly believed emotion, not reason, gave true meaning to life. By getting in touch with their own feelings, they were able to embark on an aesthetic journey of self-discovery. Just in case you people might be wondering (which I rather doubt), here are the qualities of the Romantic hero, as defined by American literary critics:


1) youthful
2) intuitive
3) innocent
4) close to nature
5) hopelessly uneasy with women who represented civilization

I'll let my reader decide on whether I do possess these qualities. But anyway, few films have made teaching Literature so inspiring. I failed the subject back in school, because all my answers went against the established canon of textbook answers. If only there was a teacher like John Keating, who could make us see the world with the colors of creativity. Science and math can give you numbers, or even a diagram of how things work, but it can't describe and draw your feelings. In fact, my university class needed a teacher of such talent and calibre. Someone who could make each and everyone of us, from the stuttering girl in the corner, to the boy with the god-like ego, breathe life into every word we wrote.

Language is beautiful. Its such beauty that makes life worth living (including making women swoon). In the world of the realist, we are bounded by the conventional limits of society, trapped in a rat race that makes the rat seem more human than we are. But no, words and ideas do change the world, even the most brilliant of naturalists take a bow to that. And yes, these things only come from dreams, the place where we are truly free. That's what makes life worth living.

'Carpe diem' my friends, be all that you can be. Just 'seize the day'

Footnote: I would like to believe the 5th characteristic of the 'romantic' fits me to a tee. After all, I am phobic towards female androids (there are tons...yikes). To quote Knox Overstreet in the film , 'the heavens made a girl like her with hair and skin of gold, to touch her would be paradise.' Lil firecracker's a natural, no doubt about that.

佳人曲

世上最‘感性’的一幕。。。



北方有佳人
绝世而独立
一顾倾人城，再顾倾人国
宁不知，倾城与倾国
佳人难再得

Erotica at its best...

Take the spot?

I'm now trying to think well of the haze by giving it more feminine names like Hazel and Hazeline. I mean since its here to stay, and we're feeling and breathing it almost every moment, I should learn to make friends with it right?

I never knew jackasses could be schizophrenics too. Seriously, 'A Beautiful Mind' was the life of disturbed genius, 'Fight Club' is just disturbing. I mean an alter ego becomes the mind behind an anti-establishment band of thugs? Beer-drinking, fight picking blokes sure know how to take orders from mad people. Now, I do know that the 'Tyler Turden' in me just wants to go to the wide open window, and take a deep breath. Imagine getting euphoric from greenhouse dust.

This Christmas, I wonder where I would be. There will be much to be thankful for, and there isn't anything I'm lacking ...just maybe....

a dance,
a symphony,
a love note,

Tell me, what would you do?

Do anything, but don't give it away...please? No one else can take it.

Reflection

I will be sitting for my writing test for SPH tomorrow. I didn't think I would be called up, but since they've given me the chance, it certainly is something to be thankful for. I'll cross my fingers and pray. Who knows, it might be a critical turning point in my life once I step in, but yeah I hope God gives me this chance at my passion. Nothing else matters more...for now at least.

Been reading 'Jesus among other Gods' by Ravi Zacharias. Very poignant, poetic apology on the Christian faith. He gets rather colloquial compared to other writers, but nevertheless its a reflective comparison of Christ and religion that thugs at the heartstrings. From the case of His deity, to the question of evil, the author forces the reader, christian or atheist, to examine some hard questions regarding their very existence. I guess many of us out there prefer to believe there is a god, but we're just not bothered to ask ourselves more. That's materialism for you. Only the here and now matter, but no one knows why.

Indeed, one of the most thought-provoking quotes used did not come from any of the Protestant thinkers many of my 'churchy-friends' are familiar with. Well, I'll be honest, the only Reformation thinker who really got my attention was Erasmus, because he had the brains to stay out of papal politics. Luther had an anger-management problem because he was abused by his dad, and Calvin was a chauvinist. Yeah, after graduation he actually asked his friends to help him find a woman who was 'modest, obliging, not haughty, patient and solicitous for his health.' These men firmly believed in the use of force to incite violent change. So while they cleaned up the theological corruption of the pope, they persecuted Jews and burned witches.

"An eye for an eye, makes the whole world blind"-Mahatma Gandhi

To me, the man who said this was the only guy who understood the teachings of Christ better than all the bearded theologians whom we revere during our services. Its sad he never got to believing, because back then all those 'christians' happened to be the abusive colonial masters of the Indian people. In essence, hypocrisy stumbled him. Although he never received salvation, his earthly life burned as bright as the saints of old. For those philosophy junkies who are interested in his life and works, here is a brief introduction to a life worth living:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mahatma_gandhi

Until now, it confounds me as to how Gandhi had everything right about God, but was never right with Him. Being the geek I am, its easy to store knowledge, but its hard to keep the faith, which is nothing about us and everything about Divine Grace. Still, there is much to learn from his teachings. So here is his answer to the question of evil, the quintessential debunking of all materialist and post-modern crap.

'It is the woman who has been raped who understands what rape is, not the rape. It is the one who has slandered who understands what slander is, not the slanderer. It is only the One who died for our sin who can explain to us what evil is, not the skeptics'

LOL



Japanese humor makes my day :P